부정적이라는 리플이 많아서 다시 썼습니다.

제가 작문 실력이 딸려서 겨우 쓴 게 이건데요. 진짜 한국에서 온지 2년 된 친구 있는데 걔도 이 것보단 잘쓴듯... 이제 두번째 에세이도 써야하는데 데드라인은 11월 30일이라 이번에는 아무리 에세이 내용이 형편없어도 처음부터 다시 쓸 여유가 없습니다.

그냥 여기서 처음부터 안쓰고 쉽게 고칠 수 있는건만 좀 골라 알려주세요 꾸벅꾸벅

에세이 주제는 Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community, or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.


My life has been a constant journey through different places over the world. I have lived in my native country of Korea, studied in New Zealand, and resided in both the east and the west side of the United States. During the process, I had to endure an immense cultural shock and adjust to my new community and school each time I relocate. All the hardships that I faced as an immigrant have led me to pursue a career in law. It would be my honor to help immigrants who have experienced the same unfairness as I did.

As I was born and raised in a country that is dominated by one race and one culture, it was hard for me to imagine how multicultural society would be like. From the moment I set my foot on the Auckland International Airport of New Zealand, I was electrified with a cultural shock. When I was in Korea, I have never imagined myself living in a neighborhood that is filled with people of different diversities. Therefore my first encounter with a white man was a strange experience. Caucasians, with their blond hair, blue eyes, white skin, and gigantic nose, were only supposed to exist in Hollywood movies. I felt a sense of alienation from these strangers, although I was the stranger to them. Everything was new in all aspects. Children did not bow their heads to the elders and people greeted each other when they met during a morning jog. The western culture was very surprising to me, who had grown up according to the teachings of Confucius. My adventure in New Zealand contributed tremendously for America.

Unlike the case of other immigrants to the United States, the new environment did not astonish me since I had already gotten used to a familiar culture in New Zealand. Beginning in 2005, my family and I lived in the small town of Salisbury, Maryland. Mountaire, a chicken factory, sponsored its immigrant workers to receive permanent resident status if they worked for a year. My father was among the hundreds of immigrants who spent a year with chickens. Sadly, it has been three years since my father finished working in the chicken factory, yet I still haven’t received a green card. I urgently asked for help by calling immigration offices and an attorney, but there has not been any improvement in my case status.

In a town that consists mostly of Caucasians, the minorities were often the target of mockery. I was one of many Asians who had been pushed out of the lunch line and had been called a monkey. Hispanics also suffered the same fate. Witnessing the unfair treatment that the minorities receive, I decided to pour my passion into a career in law. I want to learn laws and contribute to those who had experienced disadvantages as immigrants. Such irritating cases as Pearson v. Chung make me even more eager to realize my dream to be a lawyer and I will give my best to turn my dream into reality.

그리고 두번째 주제는 Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience thatis important to you. What about tis quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are? 인데 여기서 talent면 자기가 잘하는 거잖아요? 전 뭐 음악도 할 줄 모르고 운동도 못하는데 그럼 뭐 그냥 역사에 대해 많이 안다고 쓰는 것도 되나요? 저 한국 역사 고조선 때부터 조선 시대까지 줄줄 외우고 있는데 그 것도 그냥 간단하게 인물 몇명 이름만 외우는 정도가 아님... accomplishment는 전 뭐 student of the month 정도밖에 상 받은게 없고 experience는 아빠 liquore store에서 여름방학때 일한게 없어요 흑